glad you had fun, i did too. am rubbing aloe on my butt now.
dude chill. it wont be anything like your seventh grade birthday party.
I have a client coming in and there's a note that says she wants her hair to like Elisabeth Hasselback's from the view
that's Oklahoma for you
My parents came down to check and make sure I wasn't into any mischief then proceeded to give me alcohol.
new low.... made out with someone while peeing
you went to subway and got pissed when they refused to deep fry your sub
U just looked at me and said "wake me up when I'm done eating"
He tried to carry her to her room after she passed out, but when he picked her up she came back to, saw him, screamed rape and pulled out her vuvuzela app and blasting it like a rape whistle.
She just kept tellin me God was coming back and he was leavin her with a bag of stale doritoes and shitty friends.
remember.. you're not a homewrecker.. you're just creating options for him..
Leaving the phone at home last night was the best decision I ever made.... Though I still managed to text her and now I have 2 phones...
This reunion sucks. All the confident hot girls from high school are still confident and hot, and none of the fat girls with low self esteem transformed into hot girls with low self esteem.
All I remember is while we were making out M.A.A.D City came on so I pushed him off of me so I could rap along.
I was like ahh were on two different pages, I know there's rumors of me moving to boston but I can't and I'm not adding long distance to the relationship I have with my 31 year old recently divorced ex boss
The progression was banging a stripper banging an unemployed stripper banging a sexual entrepreneur quarantining with benefits totally fucking whipped. Get it right dude
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