Was i wearing a white blazer when you superpoke danced me??
You're mentally unstable and I would hate to be you
...She then said get into the spirit and started making firecracker noises while having sex
Valium party in the driveway. Attendance: 1. Don't make me do this alone.
It was some time between the gurgles of her blowing me to us throwing up in the same bucket afterwards that I realized we would be doing this a lot.
You're doing that 'overestimating how much I care' thing again.
Day drinking! Today! (tomorrow too!) Our place! Whenever you get off work! Ready go!
Ran out of deodorant. Febreze on a paper towel? Kicking college's ass.
Tempting guys with beer and cheese. How Midwestern are we?
I wish my nipples were as well behaved as yours.
LMAO. Stop. Men are such gentleman these days. I woke up with no one beside me and you got 6 cents
6 cents and no orgasm 💃🏻🎉
We are so blessed
All I remember is pissing by the garage and the next thing I know I'm on fire
Cum just came out of my nose. That is all.
Wearing my one sleeve dress...thought you'd like to know I shaved ONE armpit lol
No, Ethan, handcuffs and friendship bracelets are not "basically" the same thing.
Randomize
