He saved me in his phone as Easy Jen. Should I be offended?
I wouldn't worry about it. He has me as "Sex Puppet."
just saw bouncers outside a coffee shop. beginning to question humanity.
champagne bombs. Yes, i think that is where things may have gotten out of control.
Thanks for the birthday present, i had so much fun playing with it
Are you talking about my vagina?
then out of nowhere we heard a voice yell "Fuck that pussy!"
I need to start giving them away because owning 20 dildos is never going to get me a boyfriend.
If my thighs hurt from cage dancing last night, I can only imagine how yours feel
while you laid on the ground I poured water into your mouth out of dog bowl some random guy walks by and said now that's what I like to see.
The chick got into the cab with us and said we have 3 chances to guess what she just stuck up her ass. Hello to you to!
It might've been him telling me last night that he "doesn't even need beer goggles to fuck me." When I thought that was sweet, I realized something needed to change.
Just used an eyelash curler to open my beer since I didn't have a bottle opener. Things are starting to look up.
I thought i didnt really feel whatever i snorted last night until i just realized i think i asked this dude to punch me fight club style
It's amazing what a couple of orgasms can do for a girls demeanor.
as i was trying not to drunkingly fall off her toliet, i noticed her socks laying there. i quickly grabbed them, ran upstairs, and excitingly asked her if she had gotten them at sams club. she replied with, "...those are your socks."
Guy peeing and puking at the same time in the women's restroom? So impressed that I can't be offended
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