Bts the comment you were making during that picture was "look we have penises"
did you mean anything you said last night? i just wnna know
no
he has cookie breath... dont trust fat people.
adderall flavored popcorn. yes we did it and its awesome
I swear he shrunk like 2 inches. Remind me that drunk sex needs to remain drunk sex.
No, he attached a coozie to his crutches so he can carry his beer around the party.
They wouldn't let me go to sleep at the police station while I was waiting to bail u out. YOU OWE ME
using blue streamers we found on the bathroom floor was probably not the best substitute for toilet paper.
Although, I did get to see a Raiders fan and his toothless girlfriend get roughed up by the police and dragged out of the stadium. So the night wasn't a total loss.
Apparently blowing a .28 for a cop and then kissing her on the mouth is technically assaulting a police officer. Who knew.
Okay do all 29 year olds have erectile dysfunction or just the two I've slept with?
You kept yelling in my face " YOU'RE GONNA HAVE TO SUCK A DICK TONIGHT!"
Sorry, fell into some ass. Call you tomorrow.
He put rainforest music on before we had sex I felt like I was in the Amazon
i ran into the Jo the housecleaner earlier this morning. i mentioned i had a little hangover and she asked what the occasion was.. i replied "Tuesday" without thinking. she judged the shit out of me.
Randomize
