Drunk and had dance off with 8 year old. Lost. Still drinking
Woke up naked in another mans house. If that keeps happening, then I probably need to go gay. You know to make it ok.
I'm sitting in my bathroom sink, eating a tuna sandwich. He had better weed than I expected.
i feel like i was in a swimming pool of captain and coke and had to drink my way out
All I can see in the pic you sent is white shorts...
Thas my pasnts in colleg! Tehy glow! AND SMELL LIKE BEER!
You know how girls with huge tits have back problems? Do you get knee problems or something?
you regret 100% of the tequila shots you do take. thats what gretzky meant to say
YOU WOULD BE SEEING ME. IN MY KITCHEN. BENDING OVER MY OVEN. MAKING YOU CAKE.
Wait, that's an option?
I am naked in a blanket sprawled on my bed eating a pastry. This is all I want out of life. Ever.
Dude come to her party. Someone just took a body shot of rubbing alcohol
I mean I just feel if I'm not being fat and lazy then I'm not really being myself
Free stuff before I even put his balls in my mouth like wow great start
He was awesome with her today. I can't say that it didn't make my Fallopian tubes sing "The Hills Are Alive."
the guy had "bad bitches only" tattooed above his penis...
Last time I had a one night stand he ended up stalking me for two months.
So you're not picking up this weekend?
This weekend, I am Angela, visiting from Calgary. We'll have to roleplay this.
Randomize
