Dancing like a fucking crazy person to jai ho with a snow ball in her hand. Snow days make her go nuts.
wtf
I'm guessing you saw the bathroom?
Just used a champagne bottle to outline a trigonometric circle for math 104.. should i give up on life now or later?
I don't think so, think I've only met him once, the night I lost my teeth
Srsly this has gone to far. Just broke my nose on the toilet. College bars.
A baby just go on our party bus. What. The. Fuck.
Oh no I would never do that to her. But when you're single again let me know. Cheating penis is definitely better than single penis. But she has claws.
I take it we used my cleavage as a pen holder last night during the graffiti party. Looks like the colours of Crayola exploded all over my chest
Had a booty call cancel on me tonight. Said he hurt his back. So this is what single and 30-something is like. Suck.
You broke the end off a wine bottle, ran outside and screamed "FOR NARNIA!!"
I forgot how weird my hair bleaches and now I'm a calico
You can wake up to my rainbow of failure
What's his name?? He crossfits 6 times a week, works in finance & is into the occasional felony class drug. His name is irrelevant in order to know if I wanna bone him again.
I guess I was blacked out I hopped a fence and hugged a cow that night.
How do you know i dont look like i got attacked by a weedwacker on bath salts?
I'm at home, drunk, and I just called the guy I lost my virginity to and invited him to my wedding.. I've got to stop drinking by myself.
Randomize
