I just saw the dad from "Little People Big World" at the airport. I chased him down and congratulated him for beating the DUI.
I just took boredom to a whole new level. I just auto-tuned and remixed today's western civ lecture
drunk...on the white house tour...security is staring. this will not end well.
I've been drunk so often this summer being sober is exciting
No no no no no. Not interrested. She looks just like Kim's fat booth picture. Only real.
critical mistake not lubing the nipples
I just woke up to pictures of every angle of his dick I'll ever need to see.
He just called me juicy booty via text message.
How did it go last night?
Woke up head half shaved and a burrito? So good and bad?
Lucas & I had a photo shoot with her cape & I had child arm floaties on most the night.. woke up in a spiderman bed
I can't wait for the day Google doesn't remind me that I got arrested for having 3 shots called 'frog cum' lined up in front of me.
Also, any YOLOwl-related sex photos will result in you winning ten orgasms, courtesy of myself, as well as sweets and bacon-based dinner. All entrants welcome
Dude...are you really going to start sexting during our friend's memorial service?
I think I almost ran over some kid I went to high school with. Guilt factor: moderate to low.
Someone needs to lock me in a chastity belt because all my vagina does is get me into trouble. Fuck.
Randomize
