I wanna bring you to show and tell
I wrote a list of all my homework due in the next few weeks. I feel I've done enough for tonight.
jersey shore has given me a vivid depiction of what things will be like for me once i get to hell
Just promise me you won't ring in the new decade by clutching onto a toilet
Why is your signature on my underwear?
a guy tried paying for lapdances with cds, who uses those anymore?
I started to trust fall random people on the dance floor
My Mom printed off all of my Augusts text messages. Apparently I've been drinking WAY too much and having an intermediate drug problem. I have to go home everyw weekend for the rest of the semester
If she doesn't judge me for bringing my vibrator in the tanning bed, I know she is a true friend.
In college, I had one standard. Penis. A lot has changed since then. Now I really only have one standard. Breathing.
perfect irony that i'm celebrating international women's day with a yeast infection
You pretty much isn't said it
Those words don't go together.
Good because ass is like 60% of my diet now
I woke up next to a box of cheese bread it was super romantic
Also while I’m drunk I saw your penis in like 4th grade when I walked past the boys bathroom
Randomize
