i hope S**** or M***** or someone took note of the fact that i was drinking popov like water and could no longer form sentences. i mean, dont get me wrong i had been thinking about boning R*** long before my sobriety left the picture but the number of reasons not to, outweighed the temptation and without sir robert burnett as R***'s wingman, it would have never happened
You hurt me so bad and it feels so good
if i had a camp nickname it would be Flick Bean
He called me "the Joe Montana of blowies." Not sure if that is an accomplishment or an insult, but going off of the amount of condensation on the windows of my car, I'm gonna just do a little touchdown dance and pass out.
It's called penis withdraw. Or alcoholism. I get them confused these days.
debating whether or not to save the package from my first plan b pill. it would be a nice addition to any baby book.
I want to spend time with you, and by time, I mean real time. Not your dick in my mouth time.
When's a good time to tell your boyfriend you've slept with his ex girlfriend?
Dude, chad is laying across the room, violently, passionately, pornographicly eating something and I seriously think the 'some thing' is fighting back.
Wow has his pick up routine ever gotten bad. He is trying to use cheese as a way to flirt with the waitress
Oh man, he played the Harvarti cheese card and it didn't work. Now he is flailing
Thanks to that wedding, I got to use the term "finger bang" more than I have since high school.
Yeah, he hid all the toilet paper and took a video of me looking for it before I shit my pants. Definitely playing that clip at our wedding.
Low key that was incredibly dangerous to let me wield a sword at this point in the night
See, this is why you don't do nice things for people. You'll get stuck in the snow and you won't catch a dick.
why is there glitter IN my vagina????
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