I'm sorry for everything. i woke up with two citations stapled to my shirt.
let me know it goes. try not to get bit. and if you can, get someone to videotape it.
this may or may not be the weed talking, but this is by far the best tasting toothpaste i've ever had
Food Network. Taking bong rips everytime we want to eat. BOBBY FLAY.
I told her she can't come to our bonfire because she throws up on herself & she has a mustache. And now apparently I'm a bitch or something.
You fell out of your barstool, I tried to help you but you said if I got any closer I'd be drinking my meals through a straw, So there you sat.
You know you're old when tea and a hot bath are more appealing than beer pong with lesbians.
Ginormous penis in the breeze, cumming champagne showers into your eye
I feel like parents watching our children. You want to step in and help them but you just have to let them make their mistakes
what better way to celebrate the birth of jesus christ than to get embarrassingly intoxicated and make poor decisions!?
Using the money underagers give me to buy this semesters books.. My mom would be so proud
And you were like wow I love water shots they taste so good
I can tell that I'm high when listening to celine dion becomes such a life changing experience
It's to the point where if a guy can so much as find my clit, I'll consider him amazing in bed
I'm reading fall out boy fanfic. What has my life come to.
Randomize