I'm skeptical of all drag queens.
you want to go make fun of the strippers on try out night
i got kicked out last time for laughing
if your phone is working sorry i called you at 2am. if it is not then i never called your phone at 2am
Five Mah tais Laser and i skill have not drunk dial you
God, i just love slightly insecure guys with hearts of gold and giant penises.
If I have to take him to the hospital, I'm drawing dicks on his face
Because it is about to snow, I sent him for Diet Coke and cigarettes. It's the gay version of milk and bread.
Okay I take that back some girl just said pussy sweat. Get me outta here
Is it bad that I feel proud to be the first one to puke in the apartment? And I did it in style?
You straight up painted the counter with steak, tequila and beer. You owe me a knew toothbrush.
He's short and fat and honestly I think he's what my self esteem was made for
This may be a weird question to ask someone who is 21 years old, but are you grounded?
it is my last wish that my tale be published posthumously as a warning to anyone thinking of eating burger king at nine am
My tub is filled with twinkies which would be awesome if they were still wrapped and not floating in a mixture of bath water and what appears to be vomit.
Didn't realize he fucked me in a bed a dog is always in until my face swelled two sizes and I had hives all over my body. This is God's way of punishing me for having amazing sex.
Hurry I'm alone dressed like a prostitute eating French fries.
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