Ok Hollywood, I get it. Megan Fox is hot. Now she is in a movie where she is so hot that dudes just fucking die. Great.
So im going to watch Hocus Pocus in my footie pajamas... How am I in college?
What happened on tuesday that a stripper knows my full name?
Look, we all have our slutty phases. Mine is just forever.
she let a homeless guy feel her up so she could go for a ride in his shopping cart
Half my face is frozen, my vagina is broken, I'm wearing only gym shorts eating a plate of mashed potatoes, avatar is on my tv. There's a naked guy on my couch whose name idk. I needa talk to you asap
NO I FORBID YOU. THERE ARE BETTER VIRGINITIES OUT THERE WORTH KIDNAPPING.
Last night I dressed up as a cowgirl and walked into McDonald's. I bought 20 mcribs. There's pictures
Right now, there's some ten year old kid getting ready to go outside and play basketball. He will soon find out his basketball hoop was no match for my car.
Swish.
HOW MANY BOYS NOT ONLY APPROVE OF YOUR PLAN TO BECOME POCAHONTAS, BUT WANT TO MAKE SURE YOU DO IT RIGHT? One, the answer is one, and he is the best and if anyone ever tries to steal him I can assure you they will never be heard from again
You've never really lived until you tell someone you have an STD over snap chat.
I want to fuck the side burns off of Steve.
I am the fucking FIFTH wheel. How do you think it's going?
he fucked me while wearing his "Reagan Bush '84" tank and my inner democrat has never been more disappointed
Yeah I either headbutted a street sign while texting or I defended you two from an evil gang of nazi muggers. I was black out so I am gonna assume it was option b.
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