you kept yelling something about watching the muppets chirstmas carol and trying to turn the t.v. on with your car keys
Sandwiches eeeeeeverywhere.
just bought a coffee grinder that advertiesed spacious grinding chamber...new nickname for my bedroom?
That sucks. I just talked to a telemarketer for 15 minutes about CSI: Miami and weed.
I would have rather watched a full length video of myself masturbating than heard that.
i think i can safely say that is the weirdest thing you've ever propositioned me with. so obviously my answer is yes.
I gave her at least chlamydia. Maybe worse. She is also into chicks and loves taking naked pics. It's like the less I believe in Jesus, the more he rewards me.
We had 15 min before last call. Exact quote "let's see how drunk we can get."
there's still three solo cups of your puke in my basement. so that needs to be solved at some point.
Why did this happen to me why did I have to meet him if I could go back in time I never would have grabbed his dick
I feel like a drive thru vagina
Did I try to sell your body for chicken tenders last night?
So I just saw someone get shoved into a car trunk by your car.
so you can go out and drink with me then fuck me, or you can come over when i get home and fuck me, or you can come over before and fuck me, or you can come over before and after and fuck me... so many fucking options
He was gone when I woke up. But he left skid marks on my sheets and our unopened bottle of Titos is missing
New Rule: No more sleepovers with guys we met on Reddit
Randomize
