In a few years, 50 babies 50 states. Like it?
we sat in the hammock and pretended we were skydiving for three hours. jack actually started crying when i convinced him his chute didnt open.
i just went to use the bathroom this morning and I couldn't because there was someone puking in every stall. i'm going to miss the dorms this summer
i dont understand why you dont get why i love him. i opened the bathroom door and he had his penis in his right hand and a mcdouble in his left.
just put an icicle in the bong. best/worst idea ever. i think i can taste global warming right now.
I don't think I'm emotionally ready for this blow job.
high as fuck. watching parent trap with my mom. keep missing my mouth.
I am both excited and frightened by the fact that this much everclear is legal here. Best vacation ever.
So help my penis see only you. Give him some attention as well.
I just set an alarm for 5 am tomorrow morning titled "Wake and Bake Its Christmas motherfucker"
Me-World Problems: do I have my boyfriend come to my birthday party in drag, or is that too weird for the first time meeting literally any of my friends
Also I know now I was meant to be a comedian. Had both arresting officers laughing.
I can't decide if I miss drinking or you, they are so closely connected.
If it makes you feel any better, I can't find the goldfish I dropped like five minutes ago.
I think I fell asleep on my pizza last night. Damn, I am sauccccy.
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