Ok let me ask a question, does aderall make women less apt to have sex?
Cause it just destroys penises
Was that inappropriate? I can't gauge these things anymore
Got home from the bar at 4am. 100% sober, unlaid. Epic fail or responsible behavior?
Responsible fail?
I think my mom's writing a book called how to fuck with your kids when you know they're high
he was walking around the bar drinking wild turkey and gobbling simultaneously
We learned a valuable lesson from last night. You can, in fact, order bacon on a Big Mac.
i just heard Winston Churchill in auto-tune. thank you nerds.
I think forcing your little sister to drink with you on a Wednesday when she has school the next day is the low point of alcoholism.
it's been dubbed the summer of antibiotics
So apparently we dropped beers outside the apartment last night, and someone RETURNED them! Ha like what? I just walked out the front door to Christmas in a box on my doorstep.
So I love how we keep introducing our friends to sex toys. It's like pay it forward vibrator edition.
Well, I plan on starting the night dressed as little red riding hood. Then I plan on finishing the night dressed as a shit show in a red cape.
Is he gonna be my crazy ex? Cause we weren't even together for as long as my weeklong bicurious lesbian relationship.
Nobody feels the need to text me back. Men. And I sent myself a message saying nakedness. I'm all the man I need.
you said, "I wonder what your mum is doing right now." in the middle of sex, of course I threw up on you.
that is very illegal...i love you.
Randomize
