I was about to buy asher roth's album and then i realized he was a ginger. can't support
I bet the first cavemant to make fire got so much pussy
I could have mohawked her pubes.
We had sex on my friends waterbed ..after that the whole school kept asking him if he had fun getting "sea-sick" last night.
he took his pants off right in front of me then just stood there so i went for his boxers and he said he was waiting till marriage
well other than the faint smell of fireworks in the truck you can't really tell the windshield was exploded
I ate a pepperoni off of someone's floor last night. We need to talk.
The Deck is crawling with Cougars. Sound the irresponsibility alarm and come drink with me on a Tuesday night.
Fuckin wine wasted last night. Found my pants in the toilet this morning.
I'm having post-experience "why didn't I fuck her in a public bathroom" regrets
You came in last night, ate an entire avocado in silence, and then told me I should never accept rides from strangers. Not sure I even want to know what happened to you last night!
But, if I start dating you brother, I can't talk to you about the sex anymore!! Like... Can we talk about it anonymously?! I just won't use his name.
The moment when you go to plug in someone else's phone in your car and your lube is in the way. Don't mind that it's just my center console car lube. Normal.
You sat outside petting a picture of your cat for hours... not even the real thing... just a picture.
So he apologized for peeing on my floor.. then we fucked all night.
Real classy
Randomize
