There is a distinct lack of front teeth here.
My mom can no longer prohibit me from smoking pot..I sell to her boyfriend.
letting you know, as a good neighbor, that when your windows open and your shade is up we can hear and see you dancing naked to money maker... nice boobs
He told me he doesn't dance and he hates drunken excitement. Why I ever thought it would work is beyond me.
So i forgot that my head is completely wrapped in gauze, and tried to do the "come hither" look. He think's i'm brain damaged
She is just sitting by the bathroom like a little puppy waiting for a knight in shining armor to take her in there to fuck her. New low?
I just really need to get the matching flask to go with my pill box. Is this another step towards rock bottom?
I had a dream about masturbating with toys I can't afford.
My sex life and finances are equally in shambles.
So much to do, haven't done anything except hook up with sailors and work on my tan.
Just got 20% off at the liquor store. How you ask? I asked if there was an "I got divorced today" discount.
Her delivery came. She's ordered a pack of 144 condoms.
You kept saying "this bitch", mumbled incoherently for like 5 minutes, took a shot, and kept going.
Sometimes intelligent conversation doesn't mix well with a romantic interest. It's possible the two are best kept separate. Toys should just stay in the toy box.
Sooooooo, can scratch getting a pelvic exam by a man dressed as Woody from Toy Story off my list.
You need to write an essay about this experience.
He was even wearing the hat.
that may or may not have been my penis.
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