why is it that everytime a half black man enters something boring, it suddenly becomes sexy to people? golf? the presidency?
i hate this class. from the way they're all staring you would think they've never seen a girl in basketball shorts, heels and sunglasses.
We aren't going to mix hockey and sex texts tonight.
I totally agree. all sexting is on hold till after the games over.
Playoffs. This shit is serious.
I can't leave. She doesn't trust me and my penis being out in the world without supervision.
its sad im about to start saving up for how drunk i need to be for the holidays
I was trying to be an adult about it and simply deal with the situation, but a bowl seemed much more comforting.
We where late for the party because we spent the last hour staring at a towl becase we thought it was a raccoon
Ya I painted "STOP TRYING ANAL" on her headboard. I'm sick of listening to her whine through the wall and bitch the next day.
Is valentines day the worst or best day to ask for a threesome? I'm weighing some options on this high-risk manoeuvre.
Happy 420. I woke up to a girl smoking weed and dragging me out of bed. Chemistry makes so much sense high.
okcupid is pretty much insisting i hook up with this chick who looks like andy milonakis.
i rearranged my furniture so i could masturbate in the sun. how's that for spring cleaning?
My dry spell starts kindergarten this fall...
They grow up so fast.
i may or may not have bought a plane ticket for a russian cam girl to fly here. also, can you spot me $300 on rent?
By the way can you translate "sorry, she played you bruh" to Spanish? Some Hispanic guy who spoke absolutely no English callled me last night and when I tried to tell him he had the wrong number the response was "como? No no no no...." And then click. He was gone
Randomize
