i think i just saw hanson at the grocery store. one might have been a girl. hard to tell. lets call that one taylor.
If i see another girl turn you down you should either turn gay or just kill yourself
i just won an entire level on word mole with the word 'clitoris'
Girl next to me just said "as a guy I used to sweat but not I don't. it's awesome" Oh. My. God.
I like one night stands...theyre like crushes for big kids
My male hookup buddy is gonna meet my female hookup buddy, let the awkward hookup games begin!
if I want to go home with a foreign boy, please feel free to let me go, sober me gives you permission to let drunken me do it
she's sitting here naked with heels and a taco.
You told him that your vagina was the "King Crab" of all vagina's.
She bellyflopped onto the poolside bar, broke one wine bottle, and stole another...the resort staff just frowned and cleaned up her mess.
watched two friends get underages. one had a shirt on that said lets get wasted while the other said to the cop "i understand your just trying to do your job but that was dirty bro".
My boss just high fived me after finding out i made it through lunch rush rolling on molly. To think this guy used to terify me.
I am going to MURDER whoever gave him my phone number but it was probably drunk me so I'm conflicted.
NO MAKING MOLDS OF ANYONES GENITALS
Fine. Suck all the fun out of life.
Sometimes you just gotta get high and go to a planetarium. Why can't he understand that?
Randomize
