You're a big dope. Life is about fighting for what you want, not accepting what you hate.
Why does tequilla always make you text me?
names aren't important. just tell him all you want is a lil make out sesh and keep it moving.
I googled Canada's legal age of consent. I have good news. It's 14. Justin Bieber here I come...
You yelled "bananas are an excellent source of pottasium!"4 times in the middle of class. how do you not remember?
I don't even know what potassium is.
the bouncer watched the girl drop her ID, saw me pick it up and say OMG SHE LOOKS LIKE ME, and then let me use it to get into the bar
Well, they emptied out the keg by the third kegstand for America.
look at his last status update. 3:41 a.m. "i love u and miss u already egg burrito. happy trails friend." OF COURSE HE SMOKES POT.
You didn't even properly utilize my pigtails.
He's such a champ. He puked on purpose just so he'd be coherent enough to roll this blunt
I just realized my new apartment is at the corner of Patrick Henry and Mary Jane.
Give me weed or give me death?
You are the only person I know who has a fierce hatred for a five year old. Not even five year olds in general, yours is very specific
That was when I yelled "Wisconsin powers activate!" and took off sprinting across the ice
Any chance the bar is open now? Also who's wedding is this?
Who's phone is in my pants and why did I wake up clutching a handle of vlad?
so this hot guy who looks like brad pitt circa troy era in my physics lab is staring at me right now and it's taking all the willpower I have not to procreate with him right now.
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