Great. Don't do shady things like that ok?
wow, i just saw a girl period all over the floor. get my shoes
I think he may have called me a bar rat, jokingly. I said i was but in a non-trashy way.
I don't know what happened last night but I woke up this morning with "wolf pack" tattooed on my knuckles.
All the walks of shame were condensed into the hour before parents started showing up. Move out day is so bittersweet
You're breaking my vagina 4 times a day I reserve the right to know your middle name.
This is the guy who showed up to the first day of class with a 24 pack of coke and a handle of rum in his backpack. He doesnt play by normal people rules.
He woke up in the ambulance thinking he was still in the club.
Last time I stayed at my moms my fucking car got set on fire sooo maybe I should think this through.
He showed up 3 hours late wearing roller skates and acted like nothing was wrong with that.
You just handed me your ATM card and wrote your PIN number on a dollar bill and said "for bail money."
As I was about to go to sleep he asked me if I was ready to 69. HOW AM I SUPPOSED TO LOOK AT HIM IN THE FACE OVER DINNER TOMORROW
Are we in any of the areas with tornados?
Dude, i don't even have pants on yet, it's too early to think about tornadoes.
I feel like my map app knows I'm hungover and is strategically not driving me by fast food places so I cannot stop
I smell like thanksgiving dinner and bad decisions. Its not even thanksgiving yet.
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