there is a school bus full of santas parked in front of the liquor store
she might purposely get aids just to give it to you. I think she might hate you that much.
can we meet up so i can piece together the end of my night? for instance, did i jump or fall into a plant?
Im about to shotgun a beer using my mother's knitting needles. home sweet home.
Slurping strawberries throug a straw. It feels like the kool-aid man is coming in my mouth.
Btw after this weekend the chipndales costume has a 125% success rate.
sometimes after I smoke and the high has gone away...the high will come back like three hours later for a brief yet gripping ride.
that's usually when I end up in someone's house, having sex with someone else, while that someone's roommate makes us mozzarella sticks.
That's what every 12 year old basketball team needs; a drunk and hungover lady eating KD whilst cheering them on. Highlight of their lives.
All I am going to say is this: I woke up with lots of bruises on my knees from running around on all fours being a 'dinosaur'. Either girls night in went terribly wrong or terribly right.
I walked into the living room this morning and he was there with 3 shots in a row. He said it was "tea time."
was his pinky out?
but, alas, I am not the lady in the streets. I'm simply the freak in the sheets.
I feel better now, I have multiple fuck buddies again
I feel like him using the excuse "I'm not a fan of lying" to stop me from sleeping around is hypocritical since he's cheating on his wife with me.
I've just realized that today's rations have consisted of turkey bacon and jack Daniels.
He brought me a bottle of Jack, got me off 3 times, & then left. This is the best fakelationship ever!
Randomize