i get of class at 4. it takes me 17 minutes to walk home and 3 to load a bowl. thank you, priority registration.
I almost got away with it until she smelled beer on the stroller.
Been in the ER for 3 hours now. This hospitals transition to paperless is not going well. But my doctor looks like Elton John and just gave me percocet
she looked at me completely serious and said "orgasms are 15% Stronger during a hurricane" and started to take all her clothes off
I'm eating the rest of the Xmas shrooms and welcoming 2012 by communing with the pine cone.
Just ate a chocolate chip cookie upside down. This is what having a degree does for you.
Who knew there were so many rules and judgements about laying on a kitchen floor. I'm all like I'm resting. It just happens to be on a kitchen floor.
I'm just chillin on the bathroom floor
Haha oh no
The bathroom floor is like my second bedroom on the weekends
If you're still up for that roadtrip, I managed to end up in Louisiana and could use a ride home.
Please make sure you have solid number of friends around you that wouldn't be afraid to break a bottle and stab someone. If you're planning on drinking all of that, you're going to need a safety net.
I'M SO LONELY THAT I TEXTED THE FRESHMAN
Ah. Hot spring. Infinitely less skeevy than a hot tub. These North Carolinian dudes are all class.
I have not brushed my hair. I'm wearing a yoga hoodie. I look like I slept in a gutter somewhere. Today is going to be a good day.
I gave you keys to my house and drugs. This must mean we're in a relationship.
The only people who really get me are strippers and mascots for sports teams.
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