Doing "bucket stands" with buckets of margarita. Don't tell me it's not a good idea.
The worst thing about it is now I have to find someone else to fuck in the library.
the tv said "its small, its comfortable..." and i started laughing... safe to say he lost any dignity he had left...
I just found a piece of glass in my ear from Saturday.
The best part about being single is knowing how much everyone secretly creeps behind their gf/bfs back. You wouldn't believe..Have a great date night!
Just saw some dude tumble down the stairs of the bar while leaving...fist pump...and then sprint down the road
We got really stoned and then we fucked. Then he made me a panini.
Oooh, he sounds pretty classy
Actually, not at all. We were stoned so he made me a peanut butter panini. With a Rollo in the middle of it. And he left the panini press on all night. I could have died.
I will never look at a penis the same again. After that I will appreciate them so much more than I do. Makes me wanna kiss yours just for being pretty
And what in gods fuck were you drinking. It tasted like windex with a mixture of juce
The power of my boobs compel you
Yiu ever laugh so hard you stop breathing? Turns out weed -can- kill you.
The true debate: do I prioritize going to bed and getting more than six hours of sleep or do I prioritize washing out various grease, leaf bits, and jizz out of my hair
Well, I just puked in the shower in case anyone wants an update on how my day is going
honestly, you deserve someone taller anyways
I just saw a guy faceplant off a unicycle while holding a saxophone, while his buddy riding another unicycle and sporting a flute rode by laughing
Only at UConn...
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