Can Purell be used as lube?
So guy #2, the dancer, is programmed into my phone under the name H.uy. His number- 11 digits. I should have stopped drinking.
I'm about to cry with happyness at the beer that will be consumed
i keep forgetting that not all of my female friends are bisexual.
my mom just poured a water bottle of wine to take my dog on a walk...
I can't make this stuff up. Your ex is singing I Will Survive on the karaoke.
We removed her tutu and her cape, so there's no risk of her strangling herself.
The guy that just projectile vomited over the balcony is now going down to find the pill he just puked up. He said he wasn't about to waste $15.
My liver hurts and I just woke up from my first sleep in two days
Sounds like the perfect vacation
I was jumping over your garbage can screaming "Im a snow cat!!" ..Who wouldn't want to see that?
I've never been more scared for my virginity in my life. And I lost my virginity almost 6 years ago.
It was kicking off big time until you crawled out the bar on your hands and knees. Nobody wanted to mess with that.
now acid just makes me think of crab ragoon
long story short, he tried to fuck me standing up, toppled over, and now I have four stitches next to my eye
On a scale of having tea with Ghandi to the apocalypse how bad of an idea is it to drink with a 100 degree fever?
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