She said she never had to courage to go fully shaved. Since when did shaving your snatch become courageous?
At best buy, little boy just crawled into my stall while i was taking a shit
I knew the only reason I bought a smartphone was to play "You're Havin My Baby" on the way to cvs to buy Plan B.
I made out with Jen. We were naked. I'm still gay. Forever
Needing to keep one leg on the floor during sex so you dont spin should qualify for some kind of drunk award.
His lack of social graces and moral fiber complements mine nicely.
If a raisin and a desert had a bastard child that would be the inside of my mouth right now
hooking up with him was much more fun when i knew in the back of mind we'd get in some sort of trouble for it
I dressed up as a "typical white girl" which meant I wore my yoga pants and uggs all night. BEST. IDEA. EVER. Most comfy halloween everrrr.
Using the money underagers give me to buy this semesters books.. My mom would be so proud
That sounds worse than that time you thought out an entire story of how big bird would kill you
DELETE THAT VIDEO OF ME MAKING OUT WITH THAT RUG NOW
At one point I had two blunts in my hand and had no idea where they came from.
On a scale of 1 to hungover I’m definitely throwing up at the office today.
How are you and the lady friend?
Well, she's a lunatic, and I love sex, so we're good.
Randomize
