Apparently when he woke up I was tripping my face off. Everytime the cat meowed I would meow back. This went on for several hours.
I had fun last night. We should have sex less often.
Used tampon in my purse. That from you?
And then you gave the bride a high five and said "Go forth and Consummate."
It's a self-perpetuating puke chain.
oh, i've got big weekend plans. on an unrelated note, do you think viagra will work if the guy is roofied?
She ditched her BF in the library to come see me wasted at a house party and i still ended up banging that rugby chick instead.
The things I do for you. Not that I'm unhappy about it. I'm just saying you should love me.
Did you sleep with him again?
No! I just led him to believe that I would if he gets me booze. Do I have that little class that you have such minimal faith in me?
Well I can't go home with anyone tonight bc I stuffed my bra
Nothing says casual like stairwell bjs
It's like he drunk calls 6 times for me to come over, but can't say hello at lunch.
We inadvertently arrived at the strip club on Bear Night. The dancers all look like young Santa Claus and there's a buffet....
Terrible idea I love it
I’ve slept with a Senior, a Freshman and a Junior so far. I’m a Sophomore away from hitting for the cycle
I’ve basically been controlling him with my tits for months now, so I can’t even imagine what would happen if I start banging him
Randomize