GO HOME AND LIKE EVERYTHING ON COLT'S FACEBOOK UNTIL 2007.
Wtf it's a Friday night?
PRIORITIZE.
You don't have to be emotionally available for a blow job.
I hope my theory books are in my locker, but if not, I guess I can always share with you.
Who said I want to share with you?
You've sucked my dick, I'm pretty sure you don't care if I look at your theory book.
I just got a 45 minute blow job...she literally sucked the single life outta me.
u sound so gay right now
Fucking freshmen need to learn how to puke in the bushes outside the dorm and not in the fucking elevator.
i woke up wearing her shoes. this night isn't going on my highlight reel
the only way to explain how i feel is someone rolled me down a big fucking hill and then a dog came a took a huge ruthless shit in my mouth at the bottom
You told the cop FUCK YOU AND YOUR TASER, i dont think he appricaited that
They just showed up to the party with a shopping cart full stolen of naty ice cans, no boxes, just cans. Shit just got real !
Met Dan at the park for lunch and the guy parked next to us was getting a BJ the entire time. Way to make me feel like an inadequate girlfriend, random park skank. All Dan got was a double cheeseburger and a large iced tea...
I'm going to need a Jurassic park sized pooper scooper to deal with all this shit last night caused.
The crooked penis I maybe could have looked past...but no foreplay? Deal breaker.
I woke up in a bunk bed beside two Brazilians dude you have no idea how happy I was
I am now "wine pairing" tums flavors with my strongbow, because apparently hard cider gives me heartburn.
I woke up and he already had a joint rolled waiting next to the bed. Love.
Randomize