just come out here and I will go home with you...
so tomorrow. i'm thinking coinstar then adderall?
"Tonight I'm turning swine flu into an std" this might be how zombies come about. Peace civilization.
There's a man in a pair of gray footie pajamas and a paper crown watching the kids at the playground. It was easier to tell who was a pedophile before Where the Wild Things Are came out.
Her life must suck. All she's got is "Miss Shamrock" WHICH SHE LOST!
nothing like a negative hiv test and a bag of condoms to brighten my day.
this is really not the time to pretend we have morals
Was almost hungover and got scared, skipped hungover, back to hammered. Fuck real life
I got laughed at by a homeless guy in a Daniel Boone hat. I have no clue what this means for my day
I need to stop getting picked up at 3 am by my friends parents. This is the second time this week. I'm a grown man.
I stole us four large rolls of toilet paper from the hotel carts. I feel like the breadwinner in this relationship
I also have bagel bites. I know that's not as big an incentive as the cocksucking but.....
I don't care if he's the coolest coworker, if he's living in his mom's basement at 30 you should not buy drugs from him
i feel like a cleansing fire is the only way to purify the house
we cut you off when you started chasing with your slim fast shake
Randomize