these pics are all outta focus - was this what the camera saw? or what your eyes saw?
Mmmm, vodka for breakfast
I will fuck a handful of worms if you hold them
Last night I went to an anything but cups party. I took a hummingbird feeder. It was a terrible decision.
I have the Lakers game on, but all I can think about is having sex with you. Not sure what you've done here.
We're in ER. He's high on morphine and I'm drunk. Gonna score some bed pans for jello shots.
I think I broke a hole in her wall trying to do backflips
I just took a shower and found half a cookie melted under my boob. Please tell me there's a reason
I am way too attached to fictional lesbians.
FridayRule: If it takes you longer than 5 minutes to find a parking spot, you don't have class today
I lied. Can't workout today. Only exercises I'm currently capable of doing are breathing ones to keep last night's drinks ending up all over the classroom.
ever had the feeling "I've been drunk in this bathroom before?" Like De ja drunk?
I'm perplexed as to why anyone on this planet is straight
My friend just got engaged and I'm setting vibrators on fire.
Your life rocks...
....even the bartender was embarrassed for her
Randomize
