Pretty people don't get stds, I knew it
At the hair cuttery. A father here with his daughter just answered his phone "ken's whorehouse"...Now I remember why I used to pay more for haircuts.
sometimes i really wish you were a nugget.
She threw up all over when she was giving me dome. Not even gonna lie, it felt really good.
he asked me to eat out his asshole. after five minutes of uncomfortable staring i realized he was serious.
All i've done since I got back to my room today is take a three hour nap. Like, I even planned to change my pants and haven't even done that yet.
i knew you were okay when you wanted to eat in the ambulance
I sent him a naked picture of me with the caption "I lost at beer pong, this was a dare. Hope your nights going as good as mine" I've never talked to him in my life, this is a strange way to start.
We got kicked out of the ice rink last night for drinking and checking strangers... but they let us keep the beer
He fucked me so hard I had an asthma attack. I'm like the sickly poster child for celibacy.
Friends don't let friends drunk sleep in the dorm common room
I can not be a lesbian living on Beaverland.
His favorite stripper is going to jail. He's taking it pretty hard
I ended up changing her contact in my phone to "O Great Potato".
well tomorrow I get to eat fungus and go to an abandoned city.
most people would fear that statement, but i wish to join you
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