Car fucking is for special occasions like birthdays and bank holidays. Don't want to lose the magic by making it an everyday thing.
well. it's seven AM and i'm too high to hula hoop.
the trail of clothing leading from the bed to the door was in the exact order i needed to put them on. underwear near the bed shoes by the door.
Mark is going to get hypothermia. he is shirtless eating snow bc he "doesnt want to be dehydrated" tomorrow. youre in charge.
theres 5 guys on the side of the road with beads and their shirts off screaming at cars already.
I'm using the size of your dick as a guage to see how big something is on Amazon. Any questions?
90% sure you snuck in there somewhere, all I really remember is big boobs in my face so I'm assuming it was you.
Like "oh its Monday, gotta get wasted today!" not "oh its Monday.. Gotta go to class"
how the hell were we supposed to out run the cops in a bus?
He asked me if I wanted to blow his whistle and proceeded to pull out an actual whistle.
When we missed a fist bump and simultaneously did the Rocket Power handshake I knew I was going to blow him.
I don't know what's worse the fact that I woke up with a clit piercing or the fact that I didn't pay for it.
It's like we're in an emotionally distant three-way and there's not even sex to show for it.
it's like he didn't even know what a vagina was
21st birthday weekend in Vegas has concluded and all I'm missing is my underwear and 'Contacts' icon on my phone home screen.
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