are you going to last longer than 15 seconds
nope
Tostitos scoops are the best shotglasses ever. Eat it after as a chaser.
She broke up with him yesterday after she cheated on him. He's going a bachelor party next weekend. How has Homeland Security not raised the threat level?
I'm just here to guide your spirit, avoiding herpes is on you though
when I came to get Jamie there was a cop standing outside with her, made me roll down my window to tell me "she's got to go cause she won't keep her shirt buttoned"
Because everyone is allowed one half drunken 7:30 am walk back to campus in a cowgirl costume, right?
Weed is now completely legal in Colorado and Washington. I repeat weed is now legal! I'm putting a deposit down on a house as we speak.
ROADTRIP.
And we just chatted casually as i peed on the floor and she peed in the toilet
Attempting to sleep without a bra since i got my nips pierced wish me luck. Also almost sent that to my coworker.
I wanted to make fun of someone saying that to an untrained ear, skrillex is blah blah blah. But it was too soon after they said it. And now I can't find it. These are real problems.
Does Jesus have blonde highlights? Pretty sure I saw him in a lavender shirt and Sperry's.
Can you bring me the toilet please
If I show up to the mall alone looking like I do to purchase a vibrator and some Japanese food, I would judge me too.
New drinking game, drink every time Rhianna says "Work" in her new song.
You made me promise I wouldnt let you play "fuck fuck goose" with a 40 year old ever again.
Randomize