your head's too prwtty to be stuck in the books
The night began with "let go home early so we can study for my 9am final" and ended with "show me your boobs for a free pack of gum".My breasts are worth 14 sticks for a dollar.
I know its small, but please -- stop calling it my "weenis".
Apparently faking a threesome isn't as much fun as you'd think
I hate when people I sell to add me on Facebook. I'm your dealer, not your friend, C'mon people.
I don't think I'm emotionally ready for this blow job.
well what is some mechanical horse racing with out blow involved
My text message history should be ashamed of itself right now.
Watching him and my sister argue over a rum and coke about who's going to chop the coffee table in half with a hatchet...
If I don't go to Australia I'm using that towards a new car. If I do I'll use it to buy a koala.
Halfway through the night I was hiding in a trashcan. Then I "sobered" up and ran around the house throwing change because I wanted to make my last moments of 2013 charitable.
I love how when they see that I'm upset their initial response is to offer me ecstasy
i just realized I haven't been laid all summer. So sad. What a waste of a perfectly good vagina.
The sex definitely would have been a perk. But not sitting in a ditch was what I was going for...
Well Jon got a DUI sleeping in the back seat so I thought the trunk was safer. BUT WHO CARES WHY JUSE PLEASE COME LET ME OUT!
Randomize
