and this is why I hate my dad. He got 25x more angry with me when I wanted to drive a different route then he suggested to get to his house (more scenic- thus more enjoyable) then he did when I told him I was driving drunk with 4 people in the car and I got my 5th speeding ticket last night.
he is a creepy guy.
yea thats what heroine does to ppl.
SANTA'S REAL. I GOT MY PERIOD.
It got to the point that I had to make flashcards with their name on the front and dick pics on the back.
Why does it always end up with me crying in my car.
i dont know what was worse.. snorting the wasabi or puking on the neighbors dog
i want to be friends with one of those mini shredded wheat men.
Bruce the cab driver wants to take me on a date to see Taken 2
Dude. I might have just seen some porn i wasnt ready to see. The chicks were so old.
Last night I was just holding this kitten up to my face for like ten minutes telling it that it couldn't be real
Today one of my patients offered me pot brownies. Medical school worth it. Living the dream.
Ladies don't puke and tell
And remember people can't hear you kick ass in space
I think I had sex with a seagull last night. The window is open and there a feathers everywhere.
Tomorrow I'm going to tape my thumbs to my palms and my biceps to my abdomen to learn what it's like to be a t-rex for a day. Anyone else in?
Randomize
