I'm going to an arts college, I live next to the frat houses, and my room number is 420. god has plans for me and I couldn't be happier.
the cop then proceeds to point out the "proud parent of a dare graduate" bumper sticker and say well i guess it's time to take that off
You know what sound is wonderful for a hangover? Listening to the horns from the South Africans at the world cup
I just realized I am holding a beer in 133 out of 134 photos of me on my facebook page.
Nobody is perfect
I'm at Waffle House wearing one of the paper hats in the other
Numbies before the dentist, such a good idea.
He burst into tears while I was blowing him. NEVER giving a bj for a graduation present again.
i woke up and saw you were brushing his hair naked. I can never pass out around you, man.
I'm mumbling to people and trying not to accidentally shit my pants
Im just using you for your dick and your superb survival skills if needed.
He woke up in a dragon costume, covered in bong water. That was a party we will regret missing.
I can't tell if I'm still on the hangover from last night, or if I'm experiencing the one from tomorrow, because it was so powerful that it actually traveled back through time...
If I ever go to jail it will be because of you, I can feel it.
extra points if i make kids and or the elderly cry
I kinda wanna drive through the Gator bar parking lot and seeing if my panties are on they ground, they should be right next to my pride...
They weren't kidding when they said "Go Army Strong." Best sex I ever had.
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