First order of business is dropping my 9 am gym class. I'm sweating pure vodka.
She was adopted and used to dance at Sapphire. just my speed.
stayed up to watch the sunrise..saw an albino taking shots on the quad..it's like there's a whole new world of people out there just waiting to meet us
Yea.. I remember nothing. Except that the taxi driver was 56 years old and apparently never cheated on his wife.
I smell like Captain Morgan and tears
in my defense, he kept drinking all of my water.
he had diabetes and you told him to stop being a pansy!
He'd pee in it. And since it's PBR I'd have no idea
I'm just gonna go with where the wind takes me. if it takes me to his dick, so be it.
i woke up with fake boobs glued on my chest and a large black dildo on my hand. then i had to dress myself and walk home. people saw.
Like we just had a bunch of sex and then he threaded my eyebrows in bed lol. It was amazing
I raged so hard that I was so hungover today I threw up out of a car window going 50mph cause my parents didn't pull over quick enough ...sorry to the people behind us
Walk of shaming into my apartment. No one to clap me in. Come home!
I can't wait to get home and drunk cuddle your dog
Girl I'm contemplating picking up some adult diapers. That's how bad this is and it's only day 2.
eating pizza to get the taste of dick out my mouth wby
Randomize
