I wish all the girls i wanted to sleep with knew how big my dick was then id have a better chance
but i have a bet that her boyfriend is going to try and deflower her tonight so i better get a move on if i want to videotape it
do herpes really smell.
Some girl just asked us for directions back to campus. we told her to take the first four lefts. We live on a block. she believed us
well i was about to unbutton his pants but then i realized they had an elastic waste-band, so no, that didnt happen
I understand that I gave you a nose bleed with a cheeto last night and for that I apologize
Did you spray paint that captain morgan fifth that's in the freezer gold?
Aj and I already plan to tape our thumbs to our palms so we know how it feels to be a t-rex.
He managed to crash an entire train of shopping carts into a wall. I think he noticed my implants.
just woke up and currently drinking copious amounts of eggnog straight from the carton to replenish the electrolytes lost last night
Grandpa just put 6 jello shots on his plate. My aunt tried to take them away; he flipped her off. Living in the retirement home has hardened him.
And also ice skating can blow me. Goodnight, love you!
That was right around the time that the drunken mess pulled out his dick in front of myself and like 10 other people and started peeing all over the train platform while saying, "Sometimes a bear gets you brother. Sometimes a bear gets you."
Pretty standard Thursday night commute for you, no?
She squirted. We were both surprised. I'm that good.
Why are there naked heterosexuals in my apartment?
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