I had a disgustingly explicit dream last night involving myself and lil wayne.
ur dog is so gonna tell on us one day.
for doing what?
for smoking bowls out on the deck while your parents aren't home.
the police officer looked at my vomit and told me "milk was a bad choice"
some kid came into the principals office and tried to explain what he was sent there for through interpretive dance.
being a part time student has turned me into a full time alcoholic.
after we finished, she said she had been a backup performer for Cirque du Soleil. THAT flexible.
I don't remember him, but he's saved in my phone as "uh oh zbt"
Of course she said it wasn't that good, I don't bring my A game to pity fuck the thrice divorced girl from work
can we get together and have a vodka water gun fight? i need to get som intense excersise/alcohol
She told me my pubes were as soft as "fine wool"
I thought he was walking around the front. I just hit and run my booty call. I'm the worst non girlfriend ever
She sat on the toilet backwards so that she could hold onto the back part for balance. No she's not ready to go home.
Hopefully this dress says "let me rent your house" and not "let me suck your dick for money"
Oh hell no my vagina is on that screenshot
On the flip side Weston asked if he could move me to Wisconsin to be his "moto hoe" which is actually a thing apparently
Randomize
