I just wanted to let you know that if you dont tell me to stop texting i will still keep on trying, you matter to me
restraining order is on its way, crazy bitch
Wearing a Sarah Lawrence sweatshirt is like wearing a shirt that says, "I'm getting a degree in substitute teaching."
So are you the girl that gave me herpes? or was that the girl from the night before
It just hit me that i made out with someone's mom last night
Exactly. wat kind of friend would i be if i even pretended to give a shit about ur problems
In all honesty of all my sexual conquests, his dick is probably my proudest moment.
Yea it's a sex scar. But if anyone asks I tripped up carpeted stairs
I now have a GPA requirement for guys I hookup with more than once.
So we were having sex and his roommate walks in eating a bag of chips. Then proceeds to talk to us about his bitch of a professor.
Did he at least offer you guys chips?
sometimes when you're high at work you just have to say fuck it and eat the dog treats
Well, my eyeball is red and the rest of my eye is black. Oh the joys of drinking with u. PS- I laid in a pile of sawdust. it was ok at the time.
Why did you just send me a picture of your dinner?
CAUSE LOOK HOW MUCH SPAGHETTI I'M EATING
IT TOOK ME LIKE AN HOUR TO DO THAT. DO YOU KNOW HOW HARD IT IS FOR ME TO CONCENTRATE ON ONE THING FOR AN ENTIRE HOUR?!
so like
i may have gotten a little bit of blood in the charging port of my phone
Everything is a learning experience. Last night we learned why I'm not allowed to bring guys home from the bar....
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