he's afraid if he sleeps with me i'll go all lavender brown on him
im at planned parenthood. the form wants to know what our usual form of contraception is?
anal.
omg theres cum all over the american flag and now its up in front of his house.
I envy the lives of milf's kids, the little kid grabs her tits and she just laughs and says not now
she was using bread to soak up the vodka off the floor then proceeded to eat it.
I was so drunk. I apparently did a flip over the balcony using it as monkey bars. Ya I hurt a bit today
Katelyn drunkenly ripped the soap dispenser off the wall so we decided to call it quits
New drink: empty coke can vodka water maple syrup. Get on my level
Yup, two strangers look up at each other and realize the only connection they have is the dead woman they banged to death below them. Magic. They have to be best friends now.
I have a 8 minute video of a fish tank on my phone.
We need to stop going to pet stores high.
He played me Kanye.. Speaking my love language.. He got a well deserved BJ
I think I just read the whole internet. Front to back.
Do I masturbate or eat a pound of matazah. Alissa help what do I do??
Dude we were sitting at my place stoned as fuk then someone knocks on the door and it was my neighbor giving me a huge box of cookie dough. Magic of weed.
On a scale of one to 10 how Risky is it to sleep with a married man (all morals set aside)
Randomize
