this girl just gave me her phone number and 5 mins later right in front of me she is giving her number to another dude
call her and ask her what she thinks she's doing
Today's life lesson: fat girls should not wear tight miniskirts and vinyl leggings. This Forever 21 salesgirl is a hot mess.
don't worry, your friend will b fine, they treat virgins nicely around here
his profile picture is a blurry one of him holding a beer. i recognized him instantly.
Everytime I sleep with him he gives me another hint to what his tattoo means. I'm like a slutty Nancy Drew.
Wow, nothing is more special than changing the channel and seeing the guy who groped you on Saturday night...
I flashed some kids doing a church car wash. I feel like I really improved the quality of their lives.
I don't think you should be sorry for such memorable sex that I yell your name when you aren't around.
We're sitting in the bathtub, eating pizza, doing shots of vvodka and comparing nipples. I havfe never been so comfortable in my life.
A man can only lie in bed watching COPS for so long before he wants to do things that can lead him to starring on the show.
SOS... STANDING IN THE BAR NEXT TO MY BF AND THE GUY WHO I HOOKED UP WITH ON CHRISTMAS DAY..
I did stay at work til 5 but for the last hour I was just taking naked pics on my desk for some tinder guy
I would just like to say that I had morning sex today to the Hamilton soundtrack. So.
you tried to drunkinly do the backflip kick off of karate kid and broke the big screen
I'm about to take plan-b with a glass of wine and ramen noodles. I cannot decide who will hurt more...my vagina, my kidneys or my pride.
Randomize
