i had the deer in headlights look when she walked in and i was digging in her hamper
I wonder if all of the nights I blacked out will be revealed to me when I die. Have you ever thought about that?
Your roommate was biting my friend last night. It was weird.
we hate each other therefore the sex is mindblowing
Found a dirty envelope on my seat w ur name and $122.50 written on the front. Nothing inside but what looks like dirty pine needles
I've done nothing but whore my gay ex bf out for the past 48 hours. It's getting weird.
I did sing regulators with a random black dude at The Rail without looking at the screen, hugged him and walked off stage. I pretty much live up to all expectations.
Last night I woke up and the national rep of his frat was sucking my toe.
So, I'm about to take my pants off in the Walmart parking lot, when am old lady parks next to me. I'm all the way in the back next to the semis. What the hell?
Killing two birds with one stone tonight: mastrabation meditation. Win win.
You kept screaming, "Fuck her right in the personality" and then kissed a guy and slapped him across the face
You'll pass into the great gay beyond
Where it rains cosmopolitans and scantily clad gogo dancers of all genders direct traffic
I don't know. I'm drunk and dressed as a pirate but ill do the math tomorrow morning.
Did you wake up next to Karina?
So that's her name
Well, you started screaming "I dont know you GO AWAY" to your mom when she was holding your hair as you threw up in her garden.
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