After he came all over my face, he proceeded to give me a high five. I can't even act upset because I always put myself in these situations. Did I mention D3: Mighty Ducks was playing in the background?
Update, blind date is cute and fun.
Scratch that, blind date just threw up.
I JUST GOT MY PERIOD AND MY VISA FOR LONDON GOT APPROVED! BEST DAY EVER!
Can you tell me we didn't drink from a fish bowl we found in the bathroom last night? I know it would be a lie; I just need to hear it.
Just took a celebratory "i havent slept with anyone in this bar" shot. yesssss....
DO NOT FUCK HIM ON MY BEAN BAG CHAIR
I'm crossing my legs while pooping. Taking a shit has never looked so proper.
WHY IS MY CAR MISSING A DOOR YOU BITCH
budget cuts
YOU CANT BLAME EVERYTHING YOU DO WHILE DRUNK ON BUDGET CUTS
budget cuts are serious business
when I said energy drinks I meant cocaine
I decided staying home, watching porn and masterbating was a much better choice than the gym. And I was right.
Im having a st. Get way fucked till i speak Irish pre game party. Bring a compass cause we are about to get lost
Although now I have "number of cheese slices" as a unit of boob measurement in my head.
Is a coke binge Whole30 approved?
Is Facebook telling the truth about your nipples?!
These girls next to us are doing shots called bath salts. Sadly this is the classiest bar I've been to since i moved to PA
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