You don't need id to drink rum in an alley.
Went home with a 29 year old from the bar. Life lesson: 9 year olds stay up late sometimes
hey sry I lost all my numbers who is this?
pat the guy you slept with
still need a last name
we literally spent four hours convincing you that all 5 of your toes were there. no more everclear on a tuesday.
I've officially decided that whoever created hate sex should be on my christmas card list.
Just found pics of us from Mardi Gras last year. Your boob job really is better than mine.
we're stoned watching those roller coaster simulators w our hands up screaming on our couch
Would it be out of line to take a picture of all the earrings, rings, hairclips, and other miscellaneous girl items that I found under my bed and post it on facebook and tag all the girls that I slept with this year so they can claim their shit and get it out of my house?
The bride and groom wore the Batman masks I brought. Best wedding ever.
Finally met a man who appreciates my beer pong skills, definitely a keeper for the weekend
Naw but when she was in the bathroom I threw the condom out the window and I'm pretty sure it hit some girl
My crotch smells like fire and I can't find my pants
What, wait. You are not supposed to drink wine out of the bottle?
We go out and drink, fuck, and I stay the night. He agrees to it because he knows I'll hook him up to IV fluids in the morning. Everyone wins
You're an adult now and it's your vagina. You should do what it or you wants.
Randomize