kill, fuck, marry: alice cullen, hermione granger, ginny weasley.
damn... fuck alice for sure, I feel bad but i think I have to say marry ginny... and kill hermoine! I can't believe I'm answering this right now.
She said to delete the bj video, but I accidentally hit the 'send to her bf' button. My bad
Wouldn't pinatas filled with coke be awesome idea for cinco de mayo?
Quiet hours sex sucks. I hate finals.
just got carried INTO the bar by 4 people. it's like watching my weekend in reverse.
My boobs grew. They knew we were going to vegas.
My dick is covered in produce stickers. I suspect you
I passed out with my wizard stick taped to my hands and got woken up being poked with a St. Bernard
What part of drinking with my mom makes you think i'd get naked
All of it
As soon as the clock wound down to zero, she declared "HALF-TIME HEAD" and pulled down my pants. After the swallow, she said "BEER CHASER," got me a new one, and asked if she could make me a sandwich. Pretty sure she's lobbying hard for a ring.
I spy something regrettable...
Oh my god. Stop!! It was one time and I still can't believe it.
Grab some lube and condoms and you get a free shirt? College is weird
They wouldn't let me on the bull because I couldn't even sign my own name... She let me try 3 times...
I'm having a hard time eating my sandwich knowing how many different buttholes my hands were in last night.
I'm eating cookie dough with a tongue depressor for lunch.
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