It's weekends like this that make it obvious why we have to pay to come to college.
it felt like a thousand fairies were licking my balls.
I made a game called come to class high and eat nachos.
You threw a bottle at the bartender and then stole his tip jar. However, you were quickly KO'd by the bartender. Solid right hook.
If I die on my trip, you're my chosen person. Nightstand-vibrators. Computer-iphoto naked pictures. I hope you feel honored.
You tried to call "time out" during the sobriety test.
Can you fuck me on the kitchen counter at some point? I'll lysol it after
I posted my balls on ericas instagram. It got 17 likes.
Maybe I'm just didn't notice and imagined a different penis as a Freudian coping mechanism?
That money I left you should go to the stripper that fell asleep in your bed. Sorry
Dude. You stood in a corner laughing your ass off while folding clothes, facing the wall. Yes, they were weed brownies..
i forgot to brush my teeth before I went over so i went to the bathroom and started eating his toothpaste. we're still in the early stages of fuckdom
You must have my penis confused with someone else's...which is disappointing
just woke up on the floor with a bottle in my hand. and by bottle, i mean a baby bottle. half filled with tequila.
please god let this picture I just uploaded not have my vagina in it
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