Ummmm I went to see who was upstairs, he was the only one in his room so we had sex while the travel channel played in the background.
Oh good. Romantic. Still, I'm jealous of the sex.
Probably not, since he made me promise not to tell anyone it only lasted ten seconds.
my little sister told my dad she found willy wonka's golden ticket in the backseat of my car. now my dad knows my boyfriend uses magnums.
I wish you had a penis so you could experience peeing out the window in front of a crowd of people leaving parties.
Haha im sorry. Its just financially responsiable to bang him instead of you right now.
Me and a lesbian played "may the best man win" over a bi chick tonight... I lost, still fun though
votings over. no more wacking it to anti christine o'donnell ads
Recent Google searches: "babu kangarooz"... "why 2 tacos bell" and "is dinosaur in real life"
Took 45 minutes to masturbate. Fuck you Zoloft. I'm never gonna be diagnosed with depression again
i sound like a 75 year old homeless man that has spent all his panhandling money on cigarettes since he was 12. that rough.
I haven't gotten it in awhile but since spring break is next week I'm willing to have a pregnancy scare if it means no bleeding through the suit
Yeah wouldn't want it to interfere with beach sex. Nothing should interfere with beach sex
Don't get me wrong, the sex itself is amazing, but I don't think I will EVER get used to her habit of singing lines Jesus christ super star when she is about to cum.
I have a cracked rib, no way in hell I'm bottoming for him tonight!
Is your gma going to be okay with me passed out drunk on the ground
There's times when I need to be plowed... and I'm ashamed to admit auto correct was able to predict that entire sentence.
We had sex then laid in his bed eating chocolate and drinking juice boxes. I think I'm going to keep him around.
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