There was a pool of blood on my desk and we still don't know who it belongs to. missed a good party, man.
Just wana tell you im wearing assless jorts tonight. Ive been waiting my whole life for this.
She's in the middle of blacking out but is singing Mariah carey songs. Hitting every note.
It really ruins the moment when you have to ask to resend the nude pics.
Last time we were that stoned we made a "everything you can fit in the blender" shake. Didn't end well..
I may or may not have just sent the bartender a pic of me in my slutty cheerleader costume with the caption "rah rah ree, gimme yo d"
He is crying over the toilet and his friends just came in and tried to make him take another jello shot.
FridayRule: If it takes you longer than 5 minutes to find a parking spot, you don't have class today
I ate you ate to the whole david gray album
I can't get over how you look like his sister and he wants to fuck you.
he's like watermelon oreos; I know they're gross and weird and I shouldn't like them, but I can't stop eating them because they're there.
Did you send me a cake saying 'Happy 1st One-Night Stand Ever'?
Idk, but the girl in his story had really nice eyebrows and was singing The Climb. How about you CLIMB the fuck away from my man
FORGET THE EYEBROWS
You kept running around yelling "I need my pajamas" & then you got naked. Shit just went downhill from there.
Im going for myspace 2006 goth bitch. Your worst nightmare
Randomize
