Who's your beautiful friend? Please include the words "Straight", "Single", and "Legal" in your response.
Whenever I miss you I just turn on Tool Academy
the girl next to me in class is drawing a guy banging a chick doggy style...its very detailed
I just masturbated into a dress sock. I feel fancy
I just wanna not walk straight. Is that too much to ask for?
Always fun waking up to 911 as your last dialed call.
Come over and help me clean up your so-called "winter wonderland" that you made with the fire extinguisher in the kitchen last night.
Your beautifulness. Funnyness. Sexy hairness. Coolness. Plus you ask google how far wendys is from your house. Will you marry me
I don't think everyone found it as funny as I did... Nothing says "Party's Over" like the sound of a pump action shotgun.
You were throwing up and said, "Whipe my face, I must look presentable at all times."
I'd apply for another job, but "staring out windows crying" is not a hot qualification right now.
And after peeing my pants waiting outside for him, i proceeded to drop down and roll in the nearest puddle to pretend like i just ate shit when he arrived
He asked me for a pic so I sent him a pic of my boyfriends dick.
I had to switch coats with someone at work because you can see the giant sex choke bruise on my neck. Being kinky is hard.
This is like 50 shades on steroids but with healthy relationship models and mutual respect among all parties involved and lesbian activity.
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