Now it won't go down.
You've got a gift.
please pick me up with an explanation of why i shacked in a trailer with a guy who doesnt have a car.
I remember spending $50 at Ozzie's on Friday...my Visa remembers $120.
There are taser marks on me. Your face flashed before my eyes when i woke up and saw them.
I just need to actually convince myself that drunkenly having sex won't help me forget the last time I drunkenly had sex, it only makes the situation worse.
I'm not entirely sure what we did is legal in the U.S., but I know that couple wont be the same
All i remember about last night is holding a bottle of bacardi and screaming challenge accepted!
I think the threesome was inevitable when she walked out in nothing but his boxers followed by him completely naked.
Please say a prayer for the elevator people at work today. My farts are significantly more potent the day after hitting that korean place for lunch...
I'm sending you the three minute video I jus took,....it's of me eating a pear up close
You were wearing a cookie monster onesie and telling everyone you were actually the sausage monster..
On the bright side I still got laid
My day went from bad to worse when I realized I puked out my second floor window last night.
I'm drunk still and I cried and now I'm watching Whitney Houston singing the national anthem and I'm crying more
Wow dude wow that's sad man so sad. I dno't event wanna massturbate anymore due to teh sadness
I'm gonna go take a shower so I can cleanly change into my drinking underwear.
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